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Now, here’s a mad one – did ya know some escorts in Japan do “cuddle sessions”? No funny business, just a hug! Mental, right? Got me ragin’ at first – what’s the point, I thought, bloody tease! But then – boom – genius hits. It’s all about connection, like Bob and Charlotte starin’ at Tokyo, lost but found. “Let’s never come here again,” they say, cos it’s perfect as is. Escorts nail that vibe – temporary, but proper deep.

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Man, what a day in Albavilla! Seriously, I’m still reeling from it. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds chirping, and I’m like, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Ha! Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

Nine Spaniards on shortlist for best Euro team ever