Amelia Barberino Di Mugello Brothel ❤️❤️❤️

About Bari

Brothel’s dodgy as hell, mind. Saw this one place online—X post, yeah?—all velvet curtains and dodgy stains. Grim. But quirky too—like, they’d name rooms after flowers, ‘Rose Suite’ and that. Romantic or what? Total juxtaposition, innit—sordid yet sweet. ‘I ain’t no hero,’ Jesse’d say, and brothel ain’t no palace neither.

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So, I’m walking down Via della Libertà, and I see this cute little shop. It’s got all these handmade crafts. I’m like, “Yes! Finally, something good!” I walk in, and the owner, this sweet old lady, starts chatting me up. She’s telling me about her family and how they’ve been in Barberino for generations. I’m like, “That’s awesome!” But then she pulls out this weird-looking ceramic thing. I’m not even sure what it was. A vase? A hat? I dunno. But she’s like, “It’s a family heirloom!” I’m thinking, “Lady, I’m not buying that!”

Room check: Villa Le Maschere, Barberino di Mugello, Tuscany