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Favorite part? When they hit that spot—ya know, lower back or neck—and it’s like, “The mystery of love,” straight from “Tree of Life.” Feels spiritual, fam! I’m layin’ there, eyes closed, thinkin’, “Am I ascendin’ or just horny?” Haha, for real! Once, this chick—pro masseuse—whispers, “You’re a rock, Dwayne,” and I’m like, “Hell yeah, know your role!” Nearly popped a bicep flexin’ mid-massage—dumbass move, but funny as hell.

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See photos and read reviews for the Vea Resort spa in Ciorani, Italy. Everything you need to know about the Vea Resort spa at Tripadvisor.

So, I finally make it to the fields. It’s time to do my thing. I’m out there, harvestin’ away, and it feels good. The smell of fresh crops, the sound of the engine—pure bliss. But then, I notice something weird. There’s this old lady, Nonna Maria, just starin’ at me from her balcony on Via Giuseppe Mazzini. She’s got this look like I’m some kinda alien. I wave, and she just shakes her head. Like, c’mon, Nonna! I’m just tryin’ to make a livin’ here!

Acta Paediatrica | Paediatrics Journal