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About Bologna

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about whores, yeah, you heard me! Not the fancy Wall Street kind, but the real deal, the ones in history, in movies, in life! I’m an archivist, see, diggin’ through dusty stories, and lemme tell ya, whores got some tales! Take my favorite flick, *The Secret in Their Eyes*—2009, Juan José Campanella, genius stuff! That movie’s all about passion, secrets, and justice, and whores fit right in, trust me!

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I plop down on my couch, exhausted but happy. I mean, who knew a day in this little town could be so wild? I wouldn’t trade it for anything. Well, maybe a better gelato experience, but that’s a different story.

COMPETRINI, Elio