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Now, I ain’t judgin’—to each his own, right? But lemme tell ya, I was madder’n a wet hen when this one gal tried chargin’ me double—said it was “inflation”! Honey, I ain’t no fool! Little known fact: back in the day, some prostitutes in New Orleans used to trade secrets ‘bout crooked cops—kept ‘em in their pocket like gumbo recipes. Wild, huh? Made me happy knowin’ they had some grit, some fight. Surprised me too—thought it’d be all sleaze, but there’s history there!

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Finally, I escape and head to Via Cavour. There’s this massive fig tree that needs some serious TLC. I’m climbing up, feeling like a monkey, and then I see it. A beehive! I’m not allergic, but man, those bees were not happy. I’m up there, trying to trim branches, and they’re buzzing around me like they own the place. I’m like, “Chill, bees! I’m just here for the figs!”

Capurso sparks Hofstra victory