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So, this one time, I heard ‘bout a prostitute – true story, swear it! – back in the ‘80s, she was called “Diamond Lil,” worked outta some dive in Brooklyn. Lil had a trick – she’d hum showtunes under her breath, keepin’ calm while johns got rowdy. Little known fact: she’d stash tips in her bra, said it was her “401k” – ha! Cracked me up, that grit, that hustle! Reminds me of Q’orianka Kilcher in *The New World*, y’know, that quiet strength – “What else is life but being near you?” – but Lil’s life? Near danger, near broke, near freezin’ on corners.

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The event goes off without a hitch, and I’m feeling all proud. But then, as everyone’s leaving, I realize I left my bag at the café. Ugh! So, I dash back, and of course, it’s gone. I’m freaking out, thinking I lost my life. But the barista is super nice and tells me someone turned it in. Phew! I grab it, and I’m like, “Thank you, universe!”

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