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About Rome

So, check it—ports got secrets. Old tale, 1800s, sailors tradin cod for—uh—company. Prossies hangin by docks, smokin, laughin. One time, I saw her—red skirt, eyes sharp. Alien senses kickin in, I’m like, “She’s trouble, yo.” We come in peace (robotic tone), but damn, she’s war! I’m thinkin, “This ain’t Margot Tenenbaum, nah.” More like, “You’ve been smoking, I can tell.”

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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. You know, the good stuff. I’m talking about that rich, dark espresso that slaps you awake. But guess what? The barista, this dude named Marco, totally messed up my order. I mean, how do you screw up a cappuccino? I was like, “Bro, I ordered a cappuccino, not a cup of hot milk!” Ugh, I was fuming.

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