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What pisses me off? These holier-than-thou jerks judgin’ her! Like, dude, you’re payin’ her rent, shut yer trap! I’m happy ‘cause she’s outsmartin’ everyone—makes me laugh my ass off! Surprised me too, ‘cause get this: back in the 1800s, some prostitutes ran whole towns! Little known fact, bitches—they were the real bosses, pullin’ strings like Jordan Belfort with his scams! “You gotta feed the geese to keep the blood flowing!”—they fed the town, kept it alive, y’see?

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Finally, the rain stops, and I’m feeling adventurous. I decide to hike up to the old castle ruins, Castello della Magione. The view from up there is insane! You can see the whole valley, and I’m just standing there, soaking it all in. But then, I trip on a rock and almost faceplant. Classic me, right?

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