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Real talk, tho—I knew this guy, swear to God, he’d cruise downtown every Friday. Called it “window shoppin’.” Told me once, “Phil, it’s like fishin’—you wait, you bait, you pray.” I’m like, “Man, you’re nastier’n a skunk in a henhouse!” He’d laugh, say, “A man’s got needs!” Yeah, well, so’s a dog, but you don’t see Fido payin’ for it! Made me wanna slap him upside the head, but I just shook mine instead.

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I had unprotected sex with an escort for 30 seconds but then finished with a condom. How likely am I to get an STD? 9, Views.

Man, what a day! I woke up in Crema, and let me tell ya, it was a rollercoaster. First off, I’m not even a morning person, but the sun was blasting through my window like it was trying to wake the dead. I rolled outta bed, tripped over my own shoes (classic), and thought, “Today’s gonna be wild.”

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