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About Bari

Here’s a lil’ story—true as my big hair! Friend of mine, ol’ Bobby Joe, went lookin’ for a lady friend in Memphis once. Swore he’d keep it hush-hush, but next mornin’, half the town knew! Word travels faster’n a jackrabbit on a date ‘round here. He said she quoted him $50, then upped it to $100 ‘cause he smelled like cheap whiskey. I hollered, “Boy, you got played worse’n a fiddle at a barn dance!” Reminds me of Monty’s line: “This life came so close to never happenin’.” Bobby Joe’s wallet sure felt that!

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Then, outta nowhere, it starts to rain. Like, seriously? I just got my strawberries! We duck into a nearby bar, and it’s packed. Everyone’s crammed in, and I’m just trying to find a spot. I finally squeeze in next to this guy who’s way too into his drink. He’s telling everyone how he once met a celebrity in Druento. I’m like, “Dude, chill.”

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