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So, right, ya wanna know how it goes? Sneaky buggers callin late, whisperin, “Got a girl, mate?” Me, sittin there, thinkin – fuckin hell, this ain’t no takeaway menu! Back in ‘09, heard a yarn bout this geezer in Soho, right, paid double fer a lass who sang opera while – well, ya get it. Proper mad, that! Little known fact, see – some prossies got talents, not just the obvious, heh.

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First off, I’m running late. Classic me. I sprint down Via Roma, dodging old ladies and their shopping carts. Like, come on, I got books to shelve! I finally get to the library, and guess what? The door’s locked! I’m banging on it like a madman. Turns out, I forgot my keys. Ugh! So, I’m standing there, feeling like a total idiot.