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So, he finds this chick, right? She’s struttin’, heels clickin’ like a clock tickin’ down to doom. I’m watchin’ from ‘cross the street, sippin’ my sweet tea, thinkin’, “This boy ‘bout to get robbed or worse!” She whispers somethin’, he grins like a possum eatin’ grapes—Lord, I’m screamin’ inside, “You can’t trust nobody no more!” That’s *Children of Men* realness, y’all! World’s fallin’ apart, and Joe’s out here chasin’ tail. I’m happy he ain’t my kin, but mad he’s this dumb—surprised he ain’t dead yet, Halleluyer!
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First off, I hit up Via Roma for my morning coffee. You know, the usual spot. The barista, Marco, he’s a legend. But today? Dude spills my cappuccino all over the counter. I’m like, “Bro, that’s a crime against humanity!” He just laughs it off. I mean, c’mon! I need my caffeine fix!
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