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What bugs me? The stigma! People hear “erotic-massage” and think it’s all sketchy parlors with neon signs flashin’ “Massage” in quotes. Drives me nuts! It’s an art, man! Takes skill—those hands gotta *know* ya, like they’re readin’ Braille on your spine. I respect it. Kinda jealous, actually—my hands shake too much to try givin’ one. I’d spill the oil, slip, and sue myself. Classic Larry move.

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Next, I wander over to the Church of Santa Maria Assunta. It’s stunning, like something outta a postcard. I’m standing there, just soaking it all in, when this group of tourists starts taking selfies. Like, can’t you just appreciate the beauty without a camera? But hey, whatever floats your boat, right?

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