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Once, I heard this story—some tourist got scammed by a “prostitute” who just took his wallet and ran. Left him with a pineapple and a note sayin’, “Aloha, sucker!” That’s savage, bro! Surprised me big time—thought Hawaii was all chill vibes and ukuleles. Guess not! Oh, and get this—cops here don’t even care sometimes, they’re too busy eatin’ shaved ice. True story, I swear!

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So, I’m strolling down Via Roma, coffee in hand, feeling all artsy. I’m a texture artist, right? Gotta soak in the vibes. The cobblestones are all uneven, but that’s part of the charm. I’m like, “This is gonna be a good day.” But then, BAM! A pigeon poops on my shoulder. Seriously?! I mean, c’mon, I’m just trying to vibe here.