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Well, well, mortals, gather ‘round! I’m Loki, burdened with glorious purpose, here to spill the tea on erotic-massage. Oh, yaas, it’s a slippery topic, innit? Picture this: dim lights, oiled-up hands, and some poor sod thinkin’ they’re in for a “relaxing” time. Ha! Fooled ya, didn’t I? It’s sensual, it’s sneaky, and it’s got more layers than my mischief in Asgard.

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Later, I head to the market on Via Vittorio Emanuele. I need some supplies. The market’s buzzing, full of people. I grab some fresh bread from Signora Maria. She’s always got the best stuff. “You need anything else, my dear?” she asks. I’m like, “Just a miracle to get through today!” She laughs, and I feel a bit better.

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