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Downside’s the creeps, tho. Some think it’s a green light for more—gross. I’d be like, “Back off, I’m not your porn star!” Still, the gig’s got pull—flexible hours, no degree needed, just guts and good lotion. Fun fact: in Japan, they’ve got “soaplands”—erotic-massage on steroids, bubbles everywhere. Sounds slippery as hell, I’m dyin’ laughin’ thinkin’ of me tryin’ it. “I can see Russia from my house!”—and they’d see me fallin’ flat on my face.

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I finally make it back to the lab, and it’s chaos. Papers everywhere, Marco’s still panicking. I dive into the data, and after a few hours, I finally piece it together. We might’ve salvaged the experiment! I’m pumped!

Lions fan takes it to another level to pay homage to Amon-Ra St. Brown