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But - ugh. The liars. The GHOSTERS. Gets me mad. One time. Matched this babe. Sextin’ all night. She’s like - “Come over!” I’m runnin’. Shoes half on. Get there. Door’s locked. No answer. I’m yellin’ - “I ain’t got time to bleed!” Okay. Didn’t say that. But felt it! Total letdown. Sex-dating’s a gamble. Like Llewyn with his gigs. Sometimes ya score. Sometimes ya flop.

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Then, I decide to hit up the local gelateria. Gelato in Soverato is like, next level. I get a scoop of pistachio, and OMG, it’s heavenly! I’m walking back to the beach, feeling like a million bucks. But then, I trip over a beach towel. Classic me, right? I fall, gelato goes flying, and I’m just lying there, covered in sand and embarrassment.

Tight Carabinieri controls in Catanzaro area, over 700 people identified