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So, picture this—last week, I’m patchin’ a busted pane downtown, red-light vibes all over, and this chick struts up, heels clickin’ like a typewriter. “Need a date, hon?” she says, smirkin’. I’m like, lady, I’m elbow-deep in caulk, not desperation! Made me laugh, tho—balls on her, hittin’ on a sweaty dude with a putty knife. Don’t pee on my leg, sweetheart, I ain’t that lonely! Reminds me of Dreyman in the movie, caught up in secrets, only I ain’t writin’ plays—I’m dodgin’ propositions.

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After that, I’m back to work, and I get a call from a client on Via San Giovanni. They need a replacement for a broken window. I’m like, “Sure, I’ll be there in 20.” But of course, traffic is a nightmare. I’m stuck behind some slowpoke in a tiny car. I’m yelling at the radio, “C’mon, man! It’s not a Sunday drive!”

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