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Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here talkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, y’know, like it’s somethin’ real. Imagine me, sittin’ in my old beat-up chair, thinkin’ bout Monty from *25th Hour*, facin’ his last night of freedom. “You had it all, and you threw it away!”—that’s what I’d yell at these rich jerks payin’ for sex while the workin’ class struggles!

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Anyway, I’m trying to give him some solid advice, but then I hear this loud noise. Turns out, it’s a bunch of kids playing soccer in the piazza. Like, come on, guys! Can’t you see I’m trying to be all wise and stuff? But then I see them laughing, and I can’t help but smile. Bitetto’s got this vibe, ya know? The streets are narrow, but the laughter? It echoes everywhere.

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