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About Bari

Once, yeah, I saw this geezer tryna haggle with a prossie – mate, he was a right muppet! “Two quid, love!” he goes. She’s like, “Piss off, you cheap git!” Had me in stitches, swear down! But then ya clock her eyes – tired, innit. “Truth, beauty, freedom,” my arse – where’s that for her? Baz’d be ragin’, fam!

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Then, I get a call from my boss. He’s all like, “You better finish by 5!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m not a magician!” But whatever, I crank up the blaster and go to town. I’m blasting away, and it feels good. Like, really good. I’m in my zone, you know?

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