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Exaggeratin for effect—she’s a goddess, man, a queen in ripped fishnets! Okay, maybe not, but she’s real, and that’s enough. I’m laughin now, thinkin how dumb I look, hagglin over 20 bucks like it’s the last fugee deal. She’s chill, tho, says, “Relax, Morgan, you’re good.” I ain’t told her my name, but I’m rollin with it. In my head, I’m screamin—damn, this is better than a movie! No dystopia here, just two souls vibin in the wreckage. And that’s findin a prostitute, my friend—gritty, human, and fuckin alive.

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Finally, the lights flicker back on, and everyone cheers! I’m like, “Yay, we’re not in the dark ages anymore!” But then, I see this guy in the front row, totally zoned out. I mean, he’s staring into space like he’s just seen a ghost. Turns out, he was just really into the whole vibe. I mean, who wouldn’t be? Cesano-Boscone is full of surprises!

Berlusconi starts community work aiding old people