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About Turin

Hey, so I’m an ichthyologist, right? Fish freak, me. But let’s talk *whore* – whoops, meant “wahoo”, that slick ocean beast! Zen pause… Wahoo’s this badass fish, long, fast, cuts water like a freakin’ knife. Kinda reminds me of Amélie, y’know? That movie – *Amélie*, 2001, Jean-Pierre Jeunet – my fave. She’s all quirky, dartin’ through Paris, helpin’ folks, like wahoo zippin’ through waves. “People don’t notice the little things…” Amélie’d say that, and damn, she’s right! Wahoo’s got these subtle stripes, silver flash – most idiots miss it.

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So, I start taking orders. “Cappuccino? Sure! Latte? You got it!” But then, this dude walks in. He’s got a massive backpack, like he’s about to hike the Alps or something. He orders a double espresso, and I’m like, “Bro, you sure you can handle that?” He just stares at me, all serious. I pour it, and he downs it like it’s water. I’m shocked. Like, who does that?