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About Rome

Oh, and the oils—smell like Asgard’s gardens, but sticky as Hel. Pro tip: don’t wear yer best cape, ruins the vibe. There’s this one time, right, heard a yarn bout a king—dunno, some old git—paid in gold for a rubdown that lasted *three days*. Three! Mate, I’d be bored stiff—or not stiff, heh, geddit? Total madlad, that one.

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Anyway, I grab my drink and head to the park, Parco dei Castelli Romani. It’s a beautiful spot, man. Trees everywhere, birds chirping, and I’m just vibin’. But then, outta nowhere, this kid on a bike zooms past me and spills his gelato all over my shoes! I’m like, “Seriously, bro?!” I mean, it’s a hot day, but c’mon!

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