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About Bologna

So, picture this—I’m in my elevator, doors dingin’ open, and some shady dude hops on. Smells like cheap cologne and regret. I’m like, “Anyone can cook, but can ya find a decent hooker?” Straight outta *Ratatouille*, baby. He gives me this look, probs thinks I’m nuts. But I’m wonderin’—is there an app for that now? Like Uber, but with fishnets? I bet there is. Prolly called “Hoober” or some crap. Made me laugh, thinkin’ bout it—technology’s wild, man.

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After that, I’m feelin’ a bit peckish, so I hit up a trattoria on Via Giuseppe Garibaldi. I order some orecchiette with broccoli rabe. It’s like a party in my mouth! I’m lovin’ it. But then, the waiter brings me the wrong dish. I’m like, “Bro, I ordered the orecchiette, not this mystery meat!” He just shrugs and says, “It’s good, trust me.” I’m thinkin’, “Trust you? I don’t even know you!” But whatever, I’m hungry, so I dig in.

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