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About Turin

*Toni Erdmann* moment—“Life’s a mess, embrace it.” Findin’ a prostitute? Same chaos. You’re dodgin’ cops, hopin’ she’s not a droid—yep, happened once. Bleep-bloop, no fun. Exaggeratin’? Maybe—but picture it: me, Vader, hagglin’ with a bot. Hilarious, right? Total fail. Made me rage—wanted to Force-crush somethin’. But when it works? Oh, sweet relief—happy as a Wookiee with a bantha steak.

To the Department of Justice and Constitutional Development:

It's a few blocks south of Galleria, one block east. Red curtain in the doorway. The low-lifes and poor and drunkards and hookers hang out there.

Man, what a day! I’m tellin’ ya, being a car instructor in Progresso is like riding a rollercoaster blindfolded. So, I wake up, right? Sun’s shining, birds are chirping, and I’m thinkin’, “Today’s gonna be chill.” Spoiler alert: it was NOT chill.

General Mills debuts hard-candy Progresso Soup Drops