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About Palermo

So, findin’ a prostitute—where do ya even start? Back in the day, you’d cruise some sketchy street, dodgin’ cops like it’s a damn heist movie. Now? It’s all apps, cryptic posts on X, coded emojis—eggplant this, peach that. I’m like, what’s this, a fruit salad?! Drives me nuts! I’m scrollin’, thinkin’, “This is not a game, this is my life!”—straight outta Carlos, baby. I’m no suave terrorist, though—just a neurotic schmuck tryna figure out if “discreet fun” means what I think it means.

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Finally, I get my drink, and I’m feeling all fancy. I step outside, and bam! A pigeon decides my shoulder is the perfect landing spot. Like, seriously? I’m not a freaking statue! I swat it away, and it flies off, probably laughing at me. Great start, right?

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