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Found one near Vespucci Beach—tattooed, smokin’ hot, but glitchy. Kept callin’ me “Leonard”—wtf? Like “Memento,” she’s stuck in a loop. “I’ve seen you before,” she says. I’m like, “Bitch, I’m Vader!” Laughed my ass off—then she clipped into a wall. Typical GTA jank. Still, got me thinkin’—is she real? Am I real? “Remember Sammy Jankis,” my brain screams. Nolan’s fuckin’ with me even here.

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I hit the streets early, like around 7 AM. The sun was just peeking over the Adda River, and it was kinda beautiful, ya know? I strolled down Via Roma, and I swear, the coffee smell from the bar down the street was calling my name. I couldn’t resist. I grabbed a cappuccino, and man, it was like liquid gold. I was feelin’ good, ready to tackle the day.

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