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About May Pen

I’m cruisin’, right? Lookin’ for a broad. Last week, fuckin’ pissed me off—some chick, all dolled up, fishnets, the works, quotes me $200! Two Benjamins for a quick tumble? Fuhgeddaboudit! I says, “What, you think I’m made’a money, sweetheart?” She rolls her eyes, walks off—fuckin’ attitude. Reminds me’a that line, “How happy is the blameless vestal’s lot!” Yeah, right, happy my ass.

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Finally, I get past that mess and head over to the Constant Spring Market. I love that place. Fresh fruits, veggies, and the best jerk chicken you can find. I’m all about that food life. So, I grab some ripe plantains and a couple of coconuts. I’m feeling good, right? But then, I see this guy selling these crazy hats. Like, one’s got a giant pineapple on it. I’m like, “Dude, who’s wearing that?” But I can’t help but laugh. I mean, it’s Constant Spring, where anything goes.

Three-day closure for section of Constant Spring Road