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So, we chat, me an’ her. She’s called Jade – prolly fake, who cares? Tells me she’s savin’ for a flat. Dreams bigger than that bathhouse in the movie, eh? “Work hard, Jade,” I growl, “Or you’ll be sweepin’ pig pens like Chihiro!” She cackles, says I’m mad. Fair. Exaggeratin’ a bit, I reckon she’d shank me ‘fore she’d shovel shit. Tough lass, that one.

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Then, outta nowhere, this kid runs in, trippin’ over his own feet. He knocks over a whole table of snacks. Chips everywhere! I’m laughin’ so hard, I almost forget about the reports. The clients are crackin’ up too. It’s like a scene from a movie.

St Thomas police charge Yallahs woman in Canadian work permit fraud