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About Kyoto

Exaggeratin? Maybe. But picture this – me, sneakin downtown, Marge yellin, “Homer, where ya goin?!” Me, all sweaty, mutterin, “Uh, donut run!” Meanwhile, I’m eyein some dame in fishnets, thinkin, “This is my life now?” Total Coen brothers vibe – absurd, dark, hilarious. D’oh! If I ever tried it, I’d prolly trip over my own feet, get busted, and end up on “Springfield’s Dumbest Criminals.” “Serious Man” style – chaos, man, chaos!

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Then I decide to grab some lunch at this little ramen joint on Chuo-dori. Best ramen ever! I’m slurping away, and this old guy next to me starts chatting. He’s telling me about how Bibai used to have a ton of festivals. I’m like, “Dude, I’m all about that festival life!” But then he goes on about how they used to have a coal festival. I’m thinking, “Coal? Really? That’s the best you got?”

Hokkaido police warn of mountain accidents and bear attacks while picking wild plants