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Now, don’t get me wrong, ain’t no “strategery” here—just pure, sloppy bliss. Ever hear ‘bout Cleopatra? Bitch had servants massage her with rose petals—talk ‘bout extra! Me, I’d settle for some lavender oil and a gal who don’t talk politics. “I’m not the only one suffering,” from “Ten”—damn right, we all need this! Stress melts like butter on a biscuit, but watch out—some parlors got shady vibes, sketchier’n a Baghdad briefing.

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First off, I hit up the local konbini on Kumezaka Street. Grabbed my usual—onigiri and a can of iced coffee. I swear, that coffee is like rocket fuel. Anyway, I’m munchin’ away, and suddenly, I hear this loud crash. I look up, and some dude just smashed his bike into a vending machine. Classic Gushikawa moment, right? I mean, who needs a gym when you can just crash into stuff?

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