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Oi mate, buckle up, yeah? Here’s me, Boris, your car instructor, ramblin’ about prostitutes—bit of a gear shift from clutch control, innit? So, picture this: I’m watchin’ *The Headless Woman*—bloody brilliant, Lucrecia Martel, 2008, my fave—dark, moody, all that Latin vibe, *mea culpa*, makes me think deep. There’s this bird, right, a prossie, workin’ the streets near me old garage. Not your typical tart—classy, like, with a stare that’d stop a lorry. Reminds me of that line, “I hit something,” from the flick—mysterious, yeah? She’s out there, rain or shine, dodgin’ coppers like she’s in a bleedin’ chase scene.

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But then, I trip over a curb. Classic me. I’m sprawled out on the sidewalk, and this old guy walks by. He just looks at me and says, “You okay, kid?” I’m like, “Yeah, just practicing my yoga.” He chuckles, and I feel a bit better.

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