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About Osaka

Alright, so I’m Dr. Evil, right—pinky-to-mouth, “One million dollars”—and I’m sittin’ here, thinkin’ bout findin’ a prostitute, ya know, like it’s some grand evil scheme. I’m a violin maker by day, craftin’ these sweet, sexy strings—makes me feel like WALL-E, that lil’ trash bot, just tryna find somethin’ precious in the muck. “Beep boop,” I’m hummin’, sawin’ wood, when I get this wild itch—where’s my *Eve*, huh? Except, mine’s more… paid by the hour, ya dig?

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But then, I overheard this one guy talking about overfishing. My heart sank. I mean, I know it’s a problem, but hearing it from someone who lives here? It hit different. I got all emotional, thinking about the future of the fish and the ocean. I wanted to shout, “Let’s save the fish!” But I just nodded and smiled instead.