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Found one near Vespucci Beach—tattooed, smokin’ hot, but glitchy. Kept callin’ me “Leonard”—wtf? Like “Memento,” she’s stuck in a loop. “I’ve seen you before,” she says. I’m like, “Bitch, I’m Vader!” Laughed my ass off—then she clipped into a wall. Typical GTA jank. Still, got me thinkin’—is she real? Am I real? “Remember Sammy Jankis,” my brain screams. Nolan’s fuckin’ with me even here.

Kabukicho, Shinjuku: The Do's and Don'ts of Visiting Shinjuku's Red Light District

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Finally, I get to the station, and it’s chaos. My boss, Mr. Tanaka, is pacing like a caged tiger. “We got a situation!” he yells. I’m like, “What now?” Turns out, there’s a massive traffic jam on Meiji Street. Like, cars are backed up for miles. People are losing their minds. I can hear the honking from the station!

Golfplan brings Golden Age character to Kasugai’s East course