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Fun fact, yeh? Old London, prossies’d wear red ribbons—secret sign! Ain’t that wild? Me, I’d hiss at ‘em, “Get outta me swamp!” but Sméagol’s cryin’, “They’re lost, poor things!” Pfft, lost me arse—crafty, they are! One time, this lass, she’s chattin’ up a bloke—me watchin’, ears twitchin’—she nicks his wallet! Laughed me head off, precious, sneaky like me!

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I rushed to my desk, typing like a madman. My fingers were flying over the keyboard. I was sweating bullets. I mean, who knew spreadsheets could be so intense? I was like, “Why did I choose this job?” But then I remembered the sweet paycheck. Gotta pay the bills, right?