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About Sapporo

Alright, listen up, folks! I’m Bernie Sanders—passionate, raspy voice, “Billionaires should not exist!”—and I’m here to talk about findin’ a prostitute, straight up, no BS. Imagine this, ok? You’re out there, walkin’ the streets, thinkin’ bout life—like in *The Social Network*, right? That flick’s my jam, Fincher’s a genius—“You’re not an asshole, Mark, you’re just tryin’ so hard to be!”—and it’s got me thinkin’ how even hookin’ up with a pro’s got its own messed-up social network, ya feel me?

1. Kamathipura

Some kids are playing soccer on the street, and one of ‘em kicks the ball right into a food stall. The guy running it, Mr. Sato, is not happy. He’s yelling, “Watch where you kick that thing!” I’m cracking up. Kids are running, and I’m just standing there, laughing like a maniac.

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