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Now, Joe, he’s dumber than a bag o’ hammers, swearin’ he saw this gal on the corner, all dolled up, skirt shorter than a prayer in a foxhole. I said, “Boy, you blind? That ain’t no lady, that’s a trap waitin’ to snap!” Halleluyer! He didn’t listen, ran off like, “We gotta keep movin’, Theo!”—straight outta the movie, chile! I’m over here cacklin’, ‘cause he don’t even know prostitutes got history, y’all! Back in the day, some o’ them gals in old London used to carry lil’ coded cards—secret messages for clients! Ain’t that wild? Joe don’t care ‘bout no facts, he just horny and hopeless.

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We hit the Tanabe Castle Park, and I’m tryin’ to keep it cool. But then, BAM! A group of rowdy kids starts throwin’ firecrackers. I’m like, “Seriously?!” My heart’s racin’. I’m ready to tackle someone if it gets outta hand. But Tanaka just laughs. “They’re just kids!” he says. I’m thinkin’, “Yeah, kids with explosives!”

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