Elizabeth Uozu Whore ❤️

About Tokyo

Oi mate, so I’m sat here, right, thinkin’ bout whores – not in a dodgy way, mind! – and I reckon I’ve cracked it, yeah? Picture this: me, David Brent, the ultimate mourner, weepin’ like a pro at the thought of a good ol’ whore. Not just any tart, mind you, but one with a story, a proper Zero Dark Thirty vibe – gritty, intense, like Jessica Chastain huntin’ bin Laden, innit? “This is what we do, we get dirty!” – that’s the whore life, yeah, muckin’ in, no faff.

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After the aquarium, I wander over to the Uozu Castle ruins. It’s a bit of a hike, but the view is worth it. You can see the whole city from up there. I’m snapping pics, feeling like a tourist, when I hear this loud crash. I turn around, and some guy just dropped his bike. I’m dying laughing. Like, dude, how clumsy can you be?

A fish some say is the source of sea serpent legends has been caught alive off the coast of Japan