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About Osaka

So, I’m strollin’, right, lookin’ for a bird who’s up for it. Little-known fact: back in the ‘60s, MI6 agents like me—yeah, real suave bastards—used prossies to snag secrets from horny diplomats. True story! This one time, I spot her—legs for days, skirt so short it’s basically a belt. “Shaken, not stirred,” I mutter, sidlin’ up. She’s all, “Wotcha want, love?” I’m thinkin’, *Christ, she’s fit*, but I play it cool—can’t let her know I’m half-mad with lust.

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Then I decided to check out the Itayanagi Castle ruins. I mean, it’s not exactly a castle anymore, but hey, history, right? I’m wanderin’ around, and I bump into this old dude. He starts tellin’ me about the samurai who used to live there. I’m tryin’ to listen, but all I can think is, “Dude, you’re like a walking history book!”

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