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So, last week, I’m cruisin’ downtown, feelin’ like a stud—how you doin’? —and I see this chick, leather skirt, smokin’ a cig like she owns the block. I’m thinkin’, “Joey, don’t be a schmuck, say somethin’ smooth.” But nah, I just stare, cause I’m an idiot. She winks, I’m hooked—bam! Turns out, she’s been workin’ that corner since the 90s, a freakin’ legend. Little known fact: some of these girls got nicknames—like, she’s “Cinnamon” cause she once threw a spice jar at a rude john. Hilarious, right?

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But then, my phone buzzes again. It’s my boss. “Where are you?” he texts. I’m like, “Dude, I’m eating ramen! Priorities!” But I can’t ignore him. So, I rush back to the office, feeling like I just ran a marathon.