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Controls are wonky, tho—kept fallin’ off roofs, shoutin’, “Bollocks!” Graphics? Grainy as hell, but groovy in that lo-fi way. Felt authentic, y’know? Like you’re really there, smellin’ the sweat and desperation. Oh, and the ending—total mindfuck! She turns on ya, says, “Laugh now, you fool!”—straight outta Park Chan-wook’s playbook.

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So, I bail from the museum and hit up this little café on Shōwa-dōri. The barista is super chill, and I order a slice of matcha cake. It’s like heaven in my mouth! I’m sittin’ there, just vibin’, when this old dude starts talkin’ to me. He’s like, “You know, Mooka has a rich history.” I’m like, “Yeah, I just learned that in the museum.” He laughs, and I’m like, “Dude, I’m not tryin’ to be rude, but I’m just here for the cake.”

Mooka Hakki: A film with little life