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About Kawasaki

Little fact for ya—did ya know back in ol’ London, 1800s, they called ‘em “soiled doves”? Fancy name for a grim gig. Makes me laugh, thinkin’ they’re flutterin’ round like Yubaba’s birds, but nah, they’re stuck, tradin’ flesh for scraps. Saw one once, swear she winked at me—ME! Queen o’ the Seven Kingdoms! Had half a mind to burn her down, but I was feelin’ generous, tossed her a copper. She grabbed it like Zeniba grabbin’ gold, greedy little git.

In today’s world you can find pretty much anything with a smartphone.

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Then, while I’m on the line, I hear this loud crash outside. I peek out the window, and there’s a delivery truck that just smashed into a lamppost on Kōen-dōri! Like, what the heck? I’m half tempted to run out there and give the driver a piece of my mind. But nah, I gotta stay on the phone. So, I’m like, “Ma’am, can you check under your bed?” I mean, where else would a cat named Ninja hide?

The DOWNTOWN Report: mid-June 2024