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I’m pissed, too—why’s this so complicated? Apps, streets, whatever—pick one! I’m rantin’ in my head, “This is bullsh*t! Gimme a manual!” Then I laugh—‘cause it’s absurd, right? Me, hirin’ a prostitue, like I’m castin’ a movie. “You’re hired! Action!” Pretty, pretty good disaster waitin’ to happen. Oh, and get this—back in the day, some gals used coded ads in papers! “French lessons”—yeah, right! I’m dyin’ over here, imaginin’ me answerin’ that. “Can ya conjugate ‘regret’?”

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But then, this old dude starts talkin’ to me. He’s like, “You know, in my day…” and I’m like, “Oh boy, here we go.” He goes on about how Shirahama used to be a quiet fishing village. I’m nodding, but inside I’m like, “Dude, I just wanna relax!”

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