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So, real talk—where do you even start? Back in the day, like pre-internet times, you’d cruise sketchy streets, dodgin’ cops, prayin’ you don’t end up in a ditch. Fun fact: in old-school NYC, the meatpacking district—yeah, where all the fancy boutiques are now—used to be hooker central. Blows my mind! Now? It’s all digital, baby—apps, sites, coded ads. You’re scrollin’, thinkin’, “Is this legit or am I about to get catfished by some dude named Gary?” Makes me wanna scream—half the time I’m pissed at how shady it gets, half the time I’m laughin’ at the absurdity.

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Finally, I found my way out and headed to the Sue Castle. It’s this beautiful spot, man. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I took a million pics. You know, for the ‘gram. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my phone outta my hand. I was like, “Nooooo!” It felt like slow-mo. My phone hit the ground, and I was ready to cry. But guess what? It survived! Thank you, phone gods!

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