Brooklyn Sue Sexual Massage ❤️❤️❤️❤️

About Kobe

Me? I tried it once. ONCE. Some lady with hands like sandpaper, smelled like patchouli—goddamn hippies. Kept whisperin’ “relax, big guy,” while I’m lyin’ there, stiff as a board, thinkin’ bout my truck’s oil change. “There’s nothing to be done,” I growled, straight outta *Melancholia*. She didn’t get it. Kept goin’. I wanted to bolt, but my back did feel less like a rusty hinge after. Pissed me off—hate when they’re right.

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Finally, I found my way out and headed to the Sue Castle. It’s this beautiful spot, man. The cherry blossoms were in full bloom. I took a million pics. You know, for the ‘gram. But then, outta nowhere, this kid runs by and knocks my phone outta my hand. I was like, “Nooooo!” It felt like slow-mo. My phone hit the ground, and I was ready to cry. But guess what? It survived! Thank you, phone gods!

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