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Little fact for ya—didja know Victorian hookers used coded flowers? Red rose meant “I’m game!” Sneaky, huh? Love that cunning! Anyway, I’m hagglin’—she’s askin’ too much, I’m like, “C’mon, I ain’t Bruce Wayne!” She laughs, I laugh—manic, loud—hehehe! “What’s your damage?” she says. “Life, babe,” I wink, quotin’ Monty’s mirror rant: “No one’s clean.”

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Then, outta nowhere, my phone buzzes. It’s my buddy Taro. He’s like, “Yo, meet me at the park!” I’m thinking, “Dude, I’m swamped!” But then I remember the cherry blossoms on Kōen Park. They’re in full bloom, and I can’t resist.

Rights groups hounding horse festivals over abuse issues