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I’m hyped, tho—happy as a clownfish in a coral reef! Why? ‘Cause it’s a puzzle, a mystery, like *Caché*’s weird tapes showin’ up at your door. “Who sent this?” I yell, but it’s just me, overthinkin’ it, sweatin’ like a perch on a grill. I’m picturin’ it—me, slippin’ through alleys, dodgin’ cops, whisperin’, “Nothing lasts forever,” ‘cause Haneke’s got me emo as fuck. Last week, I got mad—some dude tried rippin’ me off, actin’ like he’s pimpin’ the game. I’m like, “Nah, fam, I know my fish *and* my streets!”

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But then, I got lost. Yup, classic me. I took a wrong turn and ended up in some random neighborhood. I was like, “Great, now I’m gonna be a lost tourist.” But then, this old lady saw me and started chatting. She didn’t speak much English, but her smile was universal. She offered me some homemade rice cakes. I was like, “Heck yes!”

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