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Fun fact – back in Soviet days, prostitution was “banned,” but nah, it thrived underground. Girls’d hide in plain sight, posin as waitresses. Sneaky, huh? Surprised me when I heard that. Anyway, this chick – let’s call her Natasha – she’s got sass. I’m all, “Ruh-roh, she’s trouble!” She winks, says, “500 rubles, big boy.” I’m laughin – me, a dog, payin? Scoob don’t roll that way.

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Then, boom! My phone buzzes. It’s my boss. Ugh. He’s like, “We need that report ASAP!” I’m like, “Dude, I’m in the middle of Haenam, eating tteokbokki!” But he didn’t care. So, I had to find a café. I ended up at this cute little place on Jeongdongjin-ro. The coffee was decent, but the Wi-Fi? Total garbage. I was ready to throw my laptop out the window.

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