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What shocked me? The prices—fuckin’ steep! 10,000 rubles for an hour? I’d rather buy wine and a goat! But the thrill, mate—dodgin’ the law, feelin’ alive—that’s what gets me goin’. “Life’s a long wait,” they say in the movie, and ain’t that true when yer haggelin’ with a pimp? Once, this burly git tried to rob me—swear I nearly shat meself—but I talked him down, witty as ever. “I’m small, but I bite,” I said, and he laughed, let me go.

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Then, I get to the charcoal pit, and it’s a mess. I mean, I love my job, but today? Ugh. The wood was damp, and I’m like, “Great, just what I need.” I’m tryin’ to get the fire goin’, and it’s like the wood’s playin’ hard to get. I’m sweating buckets, and I’m like, “C’mon, you stupid logs!”

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