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So here’s the deal—financially speakin’, hirin’ a prostitute’s a disaster. You’re throwin’ cash out the window—poof!—gone! No 401(k) for that, no tax write-off, nothin’. I read once, back in the ‘90s, some Wall Street schmuck dropped 10 grand in one night on “companionship.” Ten grand! Coulda bought a yacht—or at least a decent sandwich. Made me mad as hell—wastin’ money like that? I’d rather choke on my own tie. But then, I get it—some folks got urges, they’re lonely, whatever. Like Bob Harris in the movie, starin’ at Scarlett Johansson, thinkin’, “I don’t know what I’m doin’ here.” Except it’s not Scarlett—it’s some chick named Candy with a fake tan.

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So, I’m rushing outta my apartment on Gwangju-ro, and I’m already sweating. It’s like, what’s up with this humidity? Anyway, I hop on the bus, and it’s packed. Like, sardines in a can packed. I’m squished between this dude who smells like kimchi and a lady with a million bags. I’m just trying to breathe, ya know?

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